Harry Otter and the Yule Ball
by Darkblade701
Summary: In an alternate Hogwarts, Harry Otter attends the Yule Ball.


I believe it is safe to say that this is a rather atypical Harry Potter fanfiction. Enjoy.

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><p>Harry Otter and the Yule Ball<p>

It was the day of the Yule Ball. All the woodland creatures of Hogwarts were ready for a night of fun and revels. Professor McGonagall the Ermine was stroking her beard thoughtfully as she declared the Yule Ball:

"Open!" she screeched while Professor Albutt Wulfuck Percentage Brain Dumbledore the Walrus slapped his flipper enthusiastically.

"I say, chaps," noted Ron Weasel to his best friend, Harry Otter, "It doth appear to be a rather splendiferous occasion, eh wot?"

"Oh hush Ronald," said Harry Otter, "Hermione Gangrene the Otter is about to approach."

Ron Weasel nodded darkly; sagaciously: "I know."

Harry Otter gazed in abject terror at his beautiful best friend as she descended the great marble stairs that led to the Vault of Heaven. Hermione Gangrene the Otter was linked arm in arm with Victory Cum the Beaver. He swaggered even as his beautiful bride walked daintily on her glass feet.

Ron Weasel sighed; he truly loved Hermione Gangrene the Otter but she was now married to Victory Cum the Beaver. It was only natural, for she was a beautiful honorary princess and he a Quidditch superstar. He was the cousin of another famous Beaver (although that Beaver preferred to spell his name differently in order to obscure his lack of a phallus), and the wizarding version thereof in terms of popularity.

Harry Otter felt his otter penis grow hard as he admired the slim curve of Hermione Gangrene the Otter's shoulders, slim muscles working beautifully, supporting her perfect frame with utmost poise and delicacy. Her blue periwinkle turquoise blue dress flattered her gorgeous body exquisitely; her every movement was the envy of all the female _homo animalus_ that walked the ancient hallow halls of Hogwarts as she strode in dance with utter grace. Harry Otter groaned in ecstasy as he espied a single bead of glorious sweat – a crystal embodiment of Hermione Gangrene the Otter's transcendent godliness – curve down her ethereal collarbone, and climaxed.

"Such beauty is not for mortal men such as you; or women such as I," spake Ginny Weasel then unto Harry Otter.

Harry Otter then turned unto Ginny Weasel and spake thus:

"You love her too then, Ginny? Oh, but what

Cruel fate it is that doth sep'rate those who

Are merely earthly ones – creatures of dirt

And scum and filth and ooze and ash and dust –

From Hermione Gangrene the Otter."

"Indeed."

"I say old bean, sister of mine," interjected then Ron Weasel, "I have suffered too terribly under that bally black knowledge that such beauty shall never be mine, so I'm off to kill myself. Farewell, my friends, toodle pip, eh wot?"

"And now even Ronald is dead," observed Harry Otter. "But you know, Ginny: I have come to realise: those gods: Hermione Gangrene the Otter; Victory Cum the Beaver, are not beings higher than us; merely different."

"I see," said Ginny Weasel. "As they are creatures of the air, so are we creatures of the earth."

"As they twine among the heavens, we writhe in the primal rapture of lust," noted Harry Otter.

They turned to where Victory Cum the Beaver now penetrated the anus of Hermione Gangrene the Otter, weaving a sensuous dance of heavenly ecstasy.

"Quite," said Ginny Weasel. "I have come through this to realise: I love thee, Harry Otter."

"And I thee, Ginny Weasel."

And on the dance floor of the Great Hall of Hogwarts where was held the Yule Ball, while Victory Cum the Beaver engaged in anal intercourse with Hermione Gangrene the Beaver, Harry Otter and Ginny Weasel thus found in one another true love.

The two knelt, and Harry Otter's hand entered the waistband of Ginny Weasel's dress pants, and there it found a penis.

"I see: you are a hermaphrodite," said Harry Otter, as he began to jerk off his beloved.

"Indeed," said Ginny Weasel, and she kissed his lips.

THE END

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><p>If you enjoyed this unusual take on <em>Harry Potter<em>, feel free to drop a review.


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